Saturday, April 2, 2016

Status Update

I am still here.

It takes no great deductive skills to notice the comic has become a bit neglected. EV itself has never been a bastion among webcomics of punctuality or long-term records of hit deadlines. Still, a year and a half is noteworthy, especially considering that basically the most recent post was itself an apology for disappearing after a month of no updates.

So, what have I been up to the last year and a half?

More of the same, really. Anyone who has significant experience with mental illness can verify that recovery is never so cut and dry as one would wish. I was honestly doing pretty good when I made the last post, I think. But, before I knew it I was plummeting -- and that phrase "before I knew it" is significant: there's a tremendous disconnect between the state of my mental health and my perception of the state of my mental health. I ended up dropping out of school, started working pittance hours (thankfully my boss let me keep my job), and spent 2015 doing not much of anything but enduring the profoundly unpleasant combination of sensations that is clinical depression. I've changed medications more times than I can remember. My odd hours have become something of an in-joke at the office.

I think things are better now than they have been. I've been exercising regularly for a few months, which 1) indicates that I have enough energy to exercise, and 2) will cause me to have the positive health benefits of exercise; so I'm holding on to that as an encouragement that things will be better. My therapist and I agree that I don't really need to see him but once every six weeks, so I guess I've "graduated" there. I've been on the same medication for about nine months, and at no point has it made me worse (oh yeah, that's happened a couple of times). I have been taking one online class from university. I've been able to keep my living space cleaner, and my finances better budgeted, than I have in at least six months.

So, those are measurable indicators that things are better right now than they have been in some time.

What about the future?

?????????!??!??!?? :(

Yeah, no. I mean, even considering how none of us really know what the future holds, I think I have an especial amount of uncertainty. I'm hopeful that the particular details that mark my current situation will indicate a longer period of stability with fewer, less-intense, and less-frequent dips; and more of this "having enough energy to perform household chores sometimes" that I've been enjoying lately.

How about EV?

I'm making no promises. None. It might be that I never again draw a proper EV and post it on this site, and since I would make that decision based on my own needs and goals I think I could do it without regret.

I do still draw though. That's not stopped, even if EV proper has been stagnant for so long. I post a lot of my drawings on my Tumblr, interspersed amongst a gale-force barrage of furry art reblogged from other sources, as well as the curious sort of dadaist ironic humor popular on that site. Note I do not keep my Tumblr nearly so stringent of sexual content, strong language, and the like, as I do this site. The main link is here, and a link to just my artwork is here.

Also, just today, I doodled a few characters of EV. Specifically, my sona aged a year and a half with my hair much longer to reflect that I grew it out in real life (and it is just as gorgeous), then Jesi and Sandy having a nice jaw-wrestling match, and Fenic (little tufts of fur on him, and he's on his feet, look at him go!) showing his appreciation for the spectacle.

I'm considering the possibilities of semi-regularly drawing EV characters in nonsequiter slice-of-life style doodles or even comics. I am also considering opening an art booth at Salt Lake Comic Con this September, but again these are not promises and I have no firm plans for the near future of EV.

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